Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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