Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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