dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
