i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
