Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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