evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
