So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
