Is it normal to miss your booty call?
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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