Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
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