you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
