So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I would ride that face into the sunset
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