Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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