that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
