Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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