Pants 0. Shit 1.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Randomize
