Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
