Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
