p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
