If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
