it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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