I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
We don't watch enough power rangers
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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