How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
