The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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