I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
