I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
These tits shall not be calmed
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize