Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
