Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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