I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
