i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
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