I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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