If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
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