i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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