well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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