this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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