yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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