She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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