can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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