I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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