can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
