Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
