It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
