when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
It's blow job season.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
