Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
