yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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