haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
