he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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