Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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