Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
