he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
i need some magic done to my vagina
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
