508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
